The Fraggle Story

Ok, so in order to understand the Fraggle story I have to tell you my middle name. But before I tell you my middle name you have to understand that I HATE my middle name, and in order to preserve our friendship you should refrain from calling me by it once you learn what it is.

Agreed? Ok.

My middle name is Jaribu. No, it is not pronounced like 'caribou'--nothing pisses me off more. The 'I' is pronounced like an 'E'. Jar-e-bu. Got it? It's Swahili, it means 'one who tries', and yes...my parents were black hippies.

So there's a character on Fraggle Rock named Boober. My mom thought it would be cute to call me Boober since my middle name ends in 'bu'. Of course there were several variations: Jaboober, Booberloober, etc. And it was cute. WHEN I WAS NINE.

But Moms loved the nick name, and it stuck with me through middle school and high school--which would have been fine if I hadn't started developing what would turn out to be really large breasts at the age of 12. Being called anything with the word 'boob' in it at a time when you have a rack you have no clue what do with...well, you get the picture.

Unfortunately, Moms developed quite a habit with the name, and would indiscriminately call me Boober in public, around family, or *clutch the pearls* when boys would call the house to talk to me. Imagine my chagrin.
Mom: "Boooober,telephone".
Me: "MOM!!!".
Me: "Hello?"
Him: "Boober, huh? *chuckle* Yeah I bet I know where that came from"
Me:"You have no idea." **dying inside***

So yeah, that's the story. Moms still calls me Boober too, but she's more careful about it now. I get birthday cards and stuff like that with 'Boober' on the envelope.